What My Dad Said That Stuck With Me For Life.

I grew up in a wonderful, loving home.  Two parents who were supportive, kind and confident in their parenting style.  I'm not just lucky, I'm privileged.  I didn't do anything to earn having a loving set of folks.  Nothing.  It is a privilege I simply have (among MANY) and I am grateful for.  

This particular privilege helped me stay grounded, believe I could make good grades by working hard, and it helped me make healthy choices growing up.  I knew that I belonged to a supportive family who would listen when I need to talk and would be a soft space to land when I made mistakes.  

I was a very astute student, always wanting to please my teachers and my parents (uh, hello Enneagram 9).  In seventh grade, I came home with a grade on a math test that wasn't up to my usual standard.  

I was mortified.  What would my father, a high school math teacher, think of me?  What a disappointment I must be!  I could barely speak as I dug the test out of my folder.

I showed him the paper...and this is what he said.  

"Oh WOW! Celeste!  This is such GREAT NEWS! I'm so delighted that you got a 79% on this test!  I was so worried you weren't learning anything in that class.  I thought maybe we had you in the wrong section!  This is fabulous!  Look at these lovely mistakes! You have more to learn here, and that is wonderful news.  Let's go tell mom."

He was legitimately thrilled about my mistakes.  Because that meant I was...learning.

Uh, wut?

This lesson stuck with me for life, deep in my ribs.  Learning isn't pretty and often isn't kind.  But the dark parts mean you are IN it.  And that there is a lighter part of your journey waiting on the other side of that mistake.  

I'd like to pass this loving lesson that I was privileged enough to have on to you.  Because I get that not everyone is born into a loving, supportive home with a math teacher father who understood ALL THE THINGS about raising a sensitive girl who was afraid of messing up.  

So let me be that person for you today.  What are the challenges you are facing?  What are the bumpy, hard dark spots you are staring into?  In work, in your relationship, in your life.  Let me tell you this, girlfriend.  

THIS IS GREAT NEWS!  YOU ARE IN THE RIGHT CLASS...RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE!  

And you got this.  You can do it.  You can move that 79% up to a 94%.  You can soften, and make it through to bedtime after yelling at your kids.  You can connect intimately again after a hard week of surface communication with your partner.  You can and you will and it will be beautiful.  
 

I love you,
Celeste