Consider the lowly vacuum. It’s not a sex toy (hopefully). So why do you think you are instantly ready to drop trou when your partner fires up this device unprompted?
Every decision that you make, no matter how tiny, leads you in one direction or another. Do you private message that ex-boyfriend on facebook or private message your current partner? Watch the end of Real Housewives of Atlanta, or clean up the kitchen? Say “I love you.” or say nothing and go to sleep?
Why not start consistently making decisions that lead you to a better sex life? Who wouldn’t want that? We tend to think that sex is only what happens in the bedroom and that choices outside of those two Egyptian cotton sheets are irrelevant to our sexual pleasure. Mistake.
From here on out, consider everything that you do in between having sex as part of your foreplay for the next sex session.
I challenge you to start thinking of all the things that your partner loves. Sexy or not sexy. A kiss on the cheek when she gets home. The toilet seat down. An “I appreciate your hard work.” A new set of writing pens. A note in his lunch bag. An unprompted “How can I help you right now?”
You might be surprised at how the small things outside of the bedroom add up to a big bang in between the sheets.